Cancer Clear and Simple
Welcome to 'Cancer Clear and Simple,' the podcast dedicated to simplifying cancer. Join us as we discuss the world of cancer, breaking down complex concepts for our listening audience. One of our goals is to equip individuals and families dealing with cancer by providing clear, and concise insights. Through personal stories, expert interviews and practical tips, listeners are enabled to make informed decisions. Whether you're a patient, caregiver, or just simply wanting information, tune in to 'Cancer Clear and Simple' for a easy-to-follow guide on understanding and coping with cancer.
Cancer Clear and Simple
Willie Scott Cooper | The Hardest 15 Days
In this episode of Cancer Clear and Simple, Willie Scott Cooper reflects on caring for his younger brother during the final days of his life after a sudden cancer diagnosis.
What unfolds is a story of brotherhood, responsibility, and love carried across a lifetime into hospital rooms, late nights, and moments no family is ever ready for.
Willie speaks candidly about caregiving, masculinity, medical fear, and the weight carried by those who step in when it matters most. He also honors the village it takes to support a loved one, the family, friends, and community who showed up as Uncle Bug’s Army, each playing a role in care, strength, and connection.
“Nothing would mean more to me than knowing I saved one family from going through those days.”
This episode honors caregiving, the people who sit bedside, the power of community, and the importance of awareness to change what comes next.
On today's holiday episode of Cancer Clean Simple, I'm in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, sitting down with Willie Scott Cooper, entrepreneur, colon cancer advocate, and caregiver. We'll discuss Scott's journey as a caregiver, caring for his brother during his final 14 days of life. We'll also talk about his advocacy for colon cancer screening and how early detection could have saved his brother's life. This is Cancer Clearing Simple.
SPEAKER_02:Ricolo was my baby brother, the youngest of eight. He was the smallest and the youngest of us. So we called him Bug. We called him that for so long that even our children grew up calling him Uncle Bug. There was a time when Bug was being young and getting into things. My dad pulled me to the side and he said, You're your brother's keeper. If something goes left, I'm going to expect you to make it right with him. My dad was getting older, and our oldest brother was in the military. And he knew Bug looked up to me. Bug became like my son. He was surrounded by family at every stage of his life, guided, protected, and loved by us all. It took a village to help raise him, and it took that same village to care for him in the end.
SPEAKER_00:I just want to start by saying thank you so much for opening up your home and inviting me in to come and have this conversation with you.
SPEAKER_02:Welcome to our home.
SPEAKER_00:Okay.
SPEAKER_02:So I really appreciate your coming.
SPEAKER_00:Help us understand who is your brother to you.
SPEAKER_02:My Ricarlo was my baby brother. He was actually the baby of all eight. He was my baby brother slash oldest child, oldest son. About 19, I kind of took over looking after him as a father figure. So for the next 35 years, he was my ride or die. We hung out throughout our lives together, by the playing video games, me attempting to coach him not so well in some sports, um, being able to go to games. We had a thing that we would go to Cleveland Indian Games, uh, around our father who had passed away around his birthday every year. We would meet up and wherever the Indians were, we were gonna go and see him play. Okay. So he was my best friend, little brother, son. Uh how many years between you two?
SPEAKER_00:Uh ten years. Okay. Okay. And so how do you want people to remember him?
SPEAKER_02:Uh as the person who showed up for everybody. He my nieces and nephews would say, wherever you are, all you had to do was mention that you were that place, and you look up and he'd show up. They were out in LA a few years back at the X Games, and someone had posted on social media that that's where they were at. And that's where they were gonna be at that weekend. And they said, one day you look up, and who's walking through the venue but him? He didn't have any plans, but he just showed up, and the running joke was he's only gonna be there for a second. So he would be there, see you, and then just disappear as quickly as he came. And then you look on social media, and he's back at the airport heading back to Atlanta.
SPEAKER_00:I gotta know. When did he do that to you? Or can you tell us about a time when that happened?
SPEAKER_02:Um, last year, um I entered a cooking contest um on ESPN radio in Cleveland, and it's on a random Thursday in August, so I wasn't expecting anyone to take off work or anyone to come, but I gave everybody the link, and you can guys listen to it on the on the internet, on the radio. And I'm driving down for the competition, and it's in a lower um what we call the flats area of Cleveland, downtown Cleveland. And I'm driving to get to the venue, and I see this familiar walk, and he lived in Athens, Georgia. And I'm looking up and I'm like, who? And I pull up beside him and I said, Man, what are you doing here? He said, You know, I couldn't let you do this by yourself. So when I say he shows up for everybody, he would just find a way to be there when you least expected it to always show support.
SPEAKER_00:Can you take us back and help us kind of get situated in the beginning parts of this journey about caregiving for your brother? Tell us how that process started.
SPEAKER_02:I'll go back even before his illness, I'll go back to he's nine, I'm 19, and I kind of my dad is aging, and he's saying, you know, I'm gonna need you to look out for your brother and kind of be responsible um and making sure that he toes the line. So he became again my responsibility at that age. And he grew up with my kids as kind of like their big brother, um, even giving them the chicken pox. And just just the things that they grew up having, two girls having a big brother. So as he's growing in age and things, when it came time for him to go off to prom, I took him to prom and got him set up for that. Took him off to college, helped him move into his first apartment.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Um, when he moved off campus. So it's always been that thing with us as far as me caring for him. He was my baby brother, but he was my kid's and my niece and nephew's big brother. So his thing was, I want to give back to them what you gave to me. Um, earlier this year, when he got sick, um, I was flying down to hang out with him, and we were gonna go to West Pond Beach. Um March, I mean I'm sorry, February 27th. As I got down there, I flew from Cleveland to Atlanta. I was gonna meet him at the um Atlanta airport. And when I my plane landed, I got a phone call saying that he was sick and that we couldn't take our trip to West Palm Beach, that we needed to get back to Athens and um to have that opportunity to to see the doctor. And as I'm asking my niece who called to inform me, um, does he know? And she says no. You know you're gonna have to tell him, or he's never going to leave the airport because he's headstrong, we're going, we're going to Florida. There is no reason why I'm going back to Athens. We're going to Florida. So having to start that journey that day with pulling him to the side and letting him know that he had colon cancer that had metastasized and spread to his liver and his lungs.
SPEAKER_00:Can you just take us through that line of communication a little bit more between your sister finding out and him, her telling you that you're gonna have to tell him?
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, um, he was actually my niece who he was living with. Okay. And she was helping him through. He didn't go to the doctor without someone going with him. Not that he wasn't capable, but he always wanted someone to help with that. And my niece, precious, was that person who was helping him through that. She had checked, she had taken him to the doctor the day before, and they had done some scans and different things, just again, routine follow-ups. And it came back when she read the uh my chart. She read his my chart, and she noticed and contacted the doctor, and the doctor explained to her what her fear was, what she read. And as soon as I'm landing and turned my phone on, she's calling me and she's saying, Hey, you I'm on my way back to the airport. I'm coming to get you guys. And I'm like, What do you mean? She said, um, he has cancer. And we're talking, I'm like, so does he know? And she says, No, I'm pretty sure he hasn't checked the charts yet. But I did speak with the doctor to confirm it, and he wants to get him back here for a colonoscopy. And she says, and you're gonna have to tell him. There would have never been any other scenario that I would have ever wanted than if he had to hear that that he heard it from anybody but me. Okay, and it was that opportunity to pull him to the side, and we talked about it, and at that moment he looked so much like my dad, and his mannerisms just went straight to my father. He sucked on his teeth, and he was like, Man, I should have knew it was something. Hate talking to you. It was uh it was in a joking way. It was like, but I knew when you said you had to talk to me that it was gonna be something. And I said, But you know what? We'll get through it. And they said, Man, I'm hungry. I was like, well, Precious said they want to give you a colonoscopy. But man, come on. And we went and got some food at Popeye's, and I'm like, you gotta eat this before she gets back. Because I don't want to hear her mouth because I got you some food and I wasn't supposed to. And that was a part of our thing, was always I'm gonna look out for him, but I'm going to probably indulge a little more on that because again, that was my baby brother. Yeah. And I'm going to protect him, but let him have a little, probably a little too much run sometimes.
SPEAKER_00:You're talking about how close you've been to him over the years and this particular trip. Can you let us into what it looked like as far as some things that were missed?
SPEAKER_02:He he seemed to kind of allude to well over the over the years he had um had some stomach pain. And the the thought was it's an ulcer. It's an ulcer. Um, never really wanting to go to the doctor to confirm it. He gone and they said that um they were looking at acid reflux and different things over the years. But I fear that he probably wasn't going. It was the fear of going to the hospital and actually getting diagnosed. He had a fear of needles, um, all the way until the end, where holding his hand in order for them to be able to draw blood was a fear for him. So he really didn't want to go, no matter what the pain was, he would just suffer through it. But knowing that he had the stomach pains, I would always, man, you need to go and get checked out. I was like, go and find out what it is. I'm I'm fine, I'm fine, man. It's it's just my stomach. And you could see him, he have his hand under his shirt just rubbing his stomach. It's like, yeah, it's just burning, it's just burning. So you'd see him with tums or something like that, thinking that that was going to make it feel better. Um just the the general fear of going to the doctor in our community. Um the African-American male is distrusting of the medical community, and and you will hear quickly a part of that mistrust is also a misunderstanding of the Tuskegee and um the Tuskegee experiment. And we're quick to use that as the reason why I ain't going. No, because you know, you see what they did then. And when it comes to the fear of cancer, is that old saying, well, you know, they were doing just fine today. They cut them open, and then that cancer spread like wildfire. We have so many misinformations, so much misinformation. And he was no different, even though we've talked about these things, he still had his beliefs, and that belief was in based in and rooted in fear of going also with the colonoscopy, the fear of actually going through the procedure. And it was one of the things that he spoke to me after being sick, and now we've got to go and you've gotta have this procedure. He comes back with, man, if I knew it was this easy, I would have got one a long time ago.
SPEAKER_00:You talked about the fear and just how guys deal with things, and you you laid it over very carefully, very cautiously about who your brother is, treating that with care. And so I just was relating because I know that I've had those conversations where it's the hesitation, but I I don't want to do that because can we just oh I'm into that a little bit more as guys and hearing about probing and having to have things inserted in our bodies and things like that. Um there's uh the fear is there, but just the general hesitation. Um, what was some of those things like with your brother?
SPEAKER_02:And this year marks the 20th year since I first started um getting colonoscopies. And one of the the running jokes from him was always about, man, I don't know if I can do that. It's like, see, you you you okay with your um, how would he put it, uh with being um violated. And he was like, I'm I don't know about that. And I'm like, man, I'm gonna tell you what dad would say. I thought you were more of a man than that, and to worry about um diagnostic probing. And we laugh, but he was like, man, I'm just not sure that I'm ready for that. I don't um I'm not old enough. So he kept going back to, well, I I don't have to have one to I'm uh 45. He died at 44. He would have turned 45 this year, and then part of that to honor him, I started my colonoscopy prep on his birthday. I had my colonoscopy this year, the day after. And it was a part of that opportunity to continue the promise that he had me make. When he said, if I had known it was this simple, I would have gotten it done earlier. When he realized that coming out of the procedure, that he didn't feel the pain that he feared, or that the quote unquote probing wasn't bad like he thought it would be. I've always talked to my family about it. And I was like, you know what? I'm gonna keep the promise to you to make sure I tell other people. Because I hadn't spoken outside of the family um before he passed about taking colonoscopies.
SPEAKER_00:We gotta get into it. How old were you when you took your first colonoscopy? 34. 34, and what was the reason for prompting?
SPEAKER_02:Um had some, well, as I think about it now, I had some stomach pain. Um, I just lost my dad, our dad um to cancer of the small bowel, and talking to my doctor, having some stomach pains. Uh he suggested, you know what? Let's get a colonoscopy. Let's because of where his cancer was, he says, we'll do a colonoscopy and an endoscopy. And I'm like, okay. So we'll do them a week apart, need some time to. Rest, but we'll check so we can guarantee that this is just stomach pain. And I did that. And first time, perfectly fine. Everything was great. Come back in five years. Five years I go back and I have again that five years there was nothing. The next five years when I went back, I had two very large palms. Very micro abrasions, but enough to in 24 hours made me sick and I knew something was wrong. Went back to the hospital, got a um a CAT scan, found out, spent three days in the hospital. But it did not deter me from having another colonoscopy because again, knowing how big they were, they were right at the stage of concern. So talking to him again about that, and he was like, see, see what happened? You you wouldn't do that, and I was like, eh? I said, I still would rather know than not. And we would have that banter because big brother, little brother now banter of you not in charge of me. I'm grown. You you don't know. I'm like, you you gotta listen to me. It's worth it.
SPEAKER_00:I just want to back up a second for the spectrum of masculinity, right? Because I heard you say from him the term violation when it comes to the colonoscopy procedure. Yeah, right. And then what your father was saying, in terms of being like, well, you're not a man if you don't want to know, right? Or to that effect, being like, you should want, you should want to take care of this, you should want to be able to handle this, right? And just again, the acknowledgement of the contrast and what makes it difficult to make these decisions at times, right?
SPEAKER_02:And oh it's difficult because we hear all of these things again when we start to talk about that violation. Is it gonna make you something that you're not? And really trying to conquer that fear that I don't think is necessarily based right there. I think it's based in, I don't want to know. Because when I know, now I gotta start to think about it and I gotta start to deal with it. And I understand that there is a mental part of diagnosis that gets overlooked because when you hear about it, the first thing you do when you hear you have cancer or any type of ailment is you think about the worst case scenario of the people that you know.
SPEAKER_01:Okay.
SPEAKER_02:So I know that people will hear about it, and the people who are close will probably think about my brother as one of the worst case scenarios. And they will tremble in fear over it instead of saying that the knowledge of knowing we can start to treat. Okay. But that fear, and then you couple it with, hey, that's a violation. No, nothing's supposed to go there.
SPEAKER_00:So also acknowledging the way that he was using that term. It was a cover. You did mention it was ingest, it was humorous as he was bringing it up, because again, he was referring to the fact that you were already doing the necessary thing of doing the colonoscopy. And so I also was hearing the fear of knowing or finding out, but also there was a piece of the pain part that was misconstrued, right? And you said very clearly that he said, Hey, I was wrong. In the outreach space that I work in, I'm always trying to help people understand that screening is when you don't have symptoms, and testing is when you have symptoms and you're trying to find out what exactly is going on. And so I've heard both in your situation, and I'm very much valuing your commitment to knowing through the challenges. What I was wanting to point out is in your brother's understanding of the difficulties or some of the things that can go wrong in the procedure, you clearly said you had a perforated colon, and that is a complication that caused you to be hospitalized again, right? But you're you're still very confident in saying, hey, I'd rather go through that and know that I'm gonna be okay and heal from that, rather than having to heal from something that's gonna be more evasive, things are gonna have to be thrown at it that I wasn't even aware of, and go down that particular path.
SPEAKER_02:Um, true. Uh it it for me, it's always been, and this was even prior to him getting sick, and him getting sick, just strengthened my belief in that uh I would rather know and work at it from a standpoint of knowing and trying to heal than the waiting for it something to happen and get too late, um, in the process. With him from diagnosis to death was 15 days. Worst 15 days of my life. So when I think back about the perforation of my cobland and those three days in the hospital, just making sure that I didn't become septic and things like that. And being able to heal from that, I'd take that any day, then taking anybody else through those 15 days.
SPEAKER_00:Did that 15 days start from the airport?
SPEAKER_02:From the airport to his final breath was 15 days.
unknown:Wow.
SPEAKER_00:Can we start there and walking through what that was for you? Um, so the hospital, you guys went and got something to eat.
SPEAKER_02:So we were at the airport, got him some Popeyes, he wants some Popeyes, and my niece picks us up, and we're leaving Atlanta and we're driving back to Athens. And one of the things he says, you know what I want? I was like, what? Whatever you want. They was like, nah, it's probably asking too much. I'm like, man, there's never asking too much. He said, I would like for you to grill. And I said, Well, we had to go by to let my mom know in person what was going on with him. I said, as soon as we leave Granny's, we'll go pick up some ribs and go back to Press's house and we'll cook. Okay. So we do that and get back to the house, and he's in a lot of pain. But he's not really wanting to say much. And he's going back and forth upstairs as the evening went on. I'm I'm gonna lay on the couch, and he's going back and forth upstairs. He'd lay in the bed for 10 minutes, he'd come back down, he lay on the couch, and like, dude, you're in a lot of pain. We we need to go to the hospital. And he's like, Yeah, but I can't sit up in there like that. I said, Well, I'm gonna have to tell you, we'll call the ambulance. I said, They'll get us back into a room immediately if you go by ambulance. I said, and right now, I don't even want to put you on the car. And he agreed. And when he got there, when they actually got there, again, this person who's scared of the needles allowed them, they give me a shot of the morphine. And that helped on the ride to the hospital. And as we're going to the hospital, we get there, it's probably one in the morning, and sitting there waiting for them to try and get a room, and going back and forth, and trying to sleep in a chair and put my hands under my chin to hold my head up while I try to sleep in that chair and almost falling out several times and being near. He's like, Man, you could just go ahead and go home. Going back to Precious and over the grannies and come back in the morning. I'm like, nah, I'll wait. And I end up staying the night and then swapping out with my sister in the morning. And that's where our um ability to have multiple people be able to change out, um, helped out, but being able to be out there because we wanted someone with him at all times. Um can you clue us into who all was part of that network? Oh, wow. There were of the the people who were at the hospital with him, my niece precious, his niece, um, our older sister Tammy, myself, we split that time with both of them working in Georgia. I I dropped everything and left Cleveland to be down there with him for that time. So I knew Precious has a a younger, a younger child, she's three. In order to to kind of give them some um relief, I'd be at the hospital. And I'm like, I'll I'll be out here and they would swap out so I could go home and we'd hang out all together, too. But being able to be there to make sure that we all understood the continuity of care and knowing that somebody was there. Um we also were able to be in touch with everyone else through FaceTime. The modern technology is great because immediately either we would be FaceTiming or someone would record every time a doctor came in and we'd send out a message to a group that we formed called Uncle Bug's Army. We called my his nickname was Bug. And because of all of his nieces and nephews calling him Uncle Bug, that just became his name, even from his siblings. We all called him Uncle Bug. And I nicknamed the group who were all a part of this text message as his army, because everyone played a part in caregiving, whether it was through prayer, support, um, research, or actually being there sharing every detail. Um, Monique's precious did Yeoman's work with making sure that she got things transcribed and whatever came across on the my chart, doing the research and sending out all of those messages to everyone. Um, my part was being there to be with him as a confidant, as a confident builder. Um just as that big brother who is going to be there to be that strength for him, that I've always been that protector.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. Um I'm feeling a lot of that energy in terms of what you would be able to provide as a younger brother myself, you know, and just thinking about how it would feel for an older brother to be there for me is what you're saying makes a lot of sense. And you're talking about a lot of very key things that caregivers do as a network. And we've talked a little bit about caregiving on the podcast recently, but you what you with your situation, what are some of the other things that you had to let go of to step in? Because uh I'm I'm trying to follow the story of uh we we were supposed to be going on vacation, so there was a little bit of time that was expected, and then all of a sudden we had to do that.
SPEAKER_02:We I left to go to vacation, but I walked away from work. I put in for FMLA, but FMLA doesn't cover a sibling, it only covers a child or a parent or a spouse. So it didn't cover it, and I made it clear. I only have three brothers, and he means more to me than this job if I can't if it can't hold and wait for me. I'm gonna go. And I never once thought of looking back. Um being there with him was the most important thing going at that time for me. I spent of those 15 days, I spent the first seven days there. And I flew home because I'm like, I'm gonna go broke if my car stays at the airport any longer. So I flew back to get my car out of the airport parking lot. Um and I was home for about two hours and was on my way back to the airport to fly back. I would come home to Cleveland twice more during that time. Um never more than a couple hours to get back because uh it wasn't as if I could do anything different other than to bring comfort um not just to him, but to the other caregivers for support and making sure that my optimistic view on things gave encouragement to everybody. Um I have this thing with my sisters who will always say you speak so confidently when you talk to us that even when things are grim, we can hold out some hope um that it could happen. So just being able to be there with them, there's no way I could have been anywhere else. And with him waking up and seeing me over there in that chair, we didn't he didn't talk much at this point, but I could see the look in his face of okay, you over there, I can go back to sleep. So that journey of of going through we happen to have um my older brother and his wife drove down from Cleveland, and my younger sister who lives in Atlanta, drove up that first weekend. We were all in this tiny room at the hospital together. But we were able to be there and give him some support and hopes that that would be what he needs to really continue to fight, knowing that hey, somebody is here fighting with me.
SPEAKER_01:Okay.
SPEAKER_00:Um what were some things that you were doing to maintain yourself while doing this caregiving?
SPEAKER_02:During that time, not much. Um reaching out to my circle of people who cared for me. Um everyone knowing what was going on to just be that moral support for me, having that that group of my people who were gonna call and say, Hey, how you doing? Hey, give me a call. Um a gentleman that I worked with, um, and I really need to to shout that brother out, Anthony Riggs, told me that it did not matter what time of night or day. Call me if you need me. Trust me. I'm gonna answer, and I'll be there. And it was mind-blowing. I'm on the way to the hospital at four o'clock in the morning, and things weren't going great that particular day. And when I called, he answered on the first ring, and he was there, talked to me through on my drive to the hospital. Doesn't know my brother from anything, and really just met me. But the the bond of brotherhood was just that hey guy, I got you.
SPEAKER_00:Just I'm a I'm a telephone call away. My heart is smiling so big right now because. Of the reality that you just told about caregivers needing caregivers. Yes. Right. And um in the last couple episodes, I was only new to ask this question about how are you maintaining yourself because that's what I heard that was needing to be understood. But what you just outlined, you know, makes a whole lot of sense. And I'm really grateful to hear that Anthony was able to answer the phone, but no knowing that Anthony knew themselves, knows themself enough to be able to trust and give you that bridge to walk across.
SPEAKER_02:It was amazing to because I'm not one to ask for help.
SPEAKER_00:And I'm thinking about where we're talking about masculinity and everything like that. I feel it's a lot of people.
SPEAKER_02:And I can admit I am I'm toxic in that way. I would rather deal with it myself, but I will be there for you. Okay. But I won't ask. Okay. And for fear that someone might not be there. And it was a leap of faith because I was going through again the worst 15 days of my life that I'm like, all right, I'm gonna call this guy and see. And first ring, it's four o'clock in the morning, and it's as if he's awake just waiting on my call, and he doesn't know that I'm gonna call. And being there to offer that support for me while I'm giving support was everything.
unknown:Okay.
SPEAKER_02:Okay. Um from a a male perspective, it was everything needed because I have people that I could call that are going through this with me. And I don't want to make things worse for them because I'm having a moment of uncertainty. Yeah, I am supposed to be this one that's supporting everybody else.
SPEAKER_01:Okay.
SPEAKER_02:So to have someone say, hey, bruh, I got you. Just put me to the test. And these are his his actual words. He says, put me to the test. I promise you, I'll be there. And true enough. It was yeah, I I I can't say enough about it.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_02:And it and again, through this process, a lot of people have been there to help and be support. But I I single that out because he's the first person that I actually reached out to that didn't have any skin in the game, who just said, I'll be there for you to support you because we know each other, and I got you.
unknown:Okay.
SPEAKER_02:Um, everybody else, we all had a common denominator in there, denominator in there, and that was my brother. We didn't have that. And everybody should get an opportunity to experience that kind of love. To have someone care enough to be unselfish during that moment and say, I got you. Yeah. And really be there in a time of need, he'll never know how important that was. Maybe if he tunes in. Maybe if he tunes in. Um I would like that. And I'm gonna make sure that um he gets a link to this because I I want him to know. I think he should have his flowers.
SPEAKER_00:An interesting parallel that I'm noticing is that when you said you're you're there for people, but you don't want to ask, do you realize you said that about your brother? Yeah. And it's a beautiful thing that I'm hearing. And I just want to lift it up the the power and what it meant because you brought it back around as well. The the person that your family saw as a center hub was incapacitated. Who is there now to fill in that gap? And each one of you needed to find somebody. I and I I'm just noticing that, but also the moment when your brother did make that ass, he said he wanted you to grill. He thought that that would be too big. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:And I would like to dive into that part of you know, I'm I I didn't understand why, because whenever I go to Georgia, I'm gonna always grow. Okay, it's something that my family enjoys from me, so it's my way of giving to them. Okay. So I'm like, you know that's what I do, but he was like, Yeah, but we got so much going on right now, I don't want to stress you and how you do something. And I'm like, dude, come on. You know I'm gonna do it. Yeah, and he was like, okay. Okay, and to be able to get down there and do it, it's something that I had leaned on him uh 10 years earlier when we had a niece graduate from Ball State, and she my sister was giving her a graduation party, and I was cooking everything, and I was like, I got too much to do, and I can't do it all by myself. So I said, Hey, you're gonna ready to learn today. And he was like, What? Him. Oh, I told him, You're gonna learn the grill today. Okay, and he's like, What? I said, You're gonna learn the grill today. I said, I'm getting ready to show you how to season, and this is how it has to look. And this is the order to do it in. And now, once you get that done, let me know, and then we'll go down and I'll show you how to put it on the grill and how I want you to do it. I said, I need you to follow my instructions. I don't want to okay, all right. So he gets down there and he does that, and then he started doing it for the family in Georgia when I wasn't there. Oh so it's something that's passed down from generation. My dad passed it down to me, and I got an opportunity to pass it down to him and fast forwarded it to grilling here in in Wisconsin um in his memory. Um it was because he was supposed to be doing it. We had been talking about this, and it was supposed to be me passing the torch. It's your time now. I'm not gonna be doing this much longer. It's for you. And he always kept saying, Okay, okay, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready. I'm like, all right, well, it's gonna be your opportunity. And being able to do it that one last time for him, not thinking it was the last time, just thinking, hey, he said he'll eat, I'm gonna do whatever it takes to make sure he gets a chance to eat. And he ate a little bit that night, and appetite just started to wane. Although we did joke about it, he enjoyed hospital food. Trust me, the most mind-blowing thing he would eat the hospital food. And it was like, it's not bad. I'm like, no, hospital food's not good. But he would during that time he he actually enjoyed the hospital food.
SPEAKER_01:Okay.
unknown:Okay.
SPEAKER_00:So um but take us a little bit back in terms of your start to the competitive grilling scene.
SPEAKER_02:Ah, so he passed away in March. We had his funeral service, his memorial service in April. And I moved here to Milwaukee in May. And as I was getting situated, um, my sister who lives here, Cynthia, said to me, Um, hey, there's a grilling competition in Wawatosa in June. I signed you up. And I'm like, what? She said, You remember Bug being with you last year? I think it'd be pretty cool if you do that in his memory. And I'm sitting there and I'm like, what? She was like, He's you he said that you should enter that competition in Cleveland this summer, so you should do it. It was for Hardfest. And um Wabatosa, and I'm like, okay. So I agree to do this. I was good with it all the way up until two days before. Two days before I backed out in my own head. I was like, I'm not doing that. I'm trying to find a reason not to do it. Okay. And I'm like, I'm not gonna do it. I'm not gonna do it. He's not here, I'm not really feeling it. And I bought all of this stuff and I'm ready to do it, and I'm like, you know what? I can't back out. But leaning to it, I said, um, if I'm gonna do it, I gotta make it about something. It can't just be about grilling. Um I'm ultra competitive, but if it's gonna be about him, I needed to be me keeping my promise. And that promise was to keep his memory alive and to bring awareness to colon cancer. So I went out and I got um posters made about colon cancer awareness. Um, I got literature together to pass out. I got web links and things to be able to give to people about screening and created the the group. Um, my team is Uncle Bugs Army team cancer sucks. And I said, I'm gonna plaster his face all over the tables and everything with this colon cancer awareness because you know what? People are gonna come by and they're gonna taste the food, and you're not gonna just get food without getting a message, and that has become my thing no matter when, lose, or draw. I win every time I get a chance to talk to somebody. And I found in that first competition that people were so receptive to hearing my message that it really blew me away, and I'm like, I'm really good with this. And my brother belonged to a fraternity, and his line number was two. So as I'm preparing for this competition, well, as I'm competing in this competition, you get a number box, a turn-in number. Um, and as I'm getting all the samples together that they're gonna sample, I look down and on the box, the number two. And it broke me down, and I laughed as through the tears, and I said, You little buster, you did not have to show up right now. I said, now I cannot see as I'm trying to walk this food up because I know you're here with me. Yeah, um, I had a um t-shirt I had made with his face, and instead of putting it on the front, I put it on my back because I knew he always supported me, no matter what I did, so I knew he was there. But to fill that with the number two, I was like, okay. And now here comes the moment of truth. Is anybody gonna really like what I did? So um we head up to the stage for the the uh what do I call it? Uh the presentations. Yeah, yeah. And I'm not confident, I wouldn't really like how some things looked, and it was just an overwhelming day. So I'm sitting there and I'm nervous as I'm standing on stage, and when they called out the number three team, I'm like, oh, okay. I didn't come in third. Who all of these other people had competed in this competition before, and I'm the only new person here. Oh, so I'm like, if I didn't come in third, I have again, I have a team of people who showed up for me attacked on their own that are family, and now I'm sweating because I'm like, if I don't win the names online, I'm like, these people came, took time out of a Saturday, they've been here all day with me. This is gonna be embarrassing. Okay. And to hear that name called second was mind-blowing, and I couldn't hear anything else after they called the name, and I'm trying to walk forward. They told me to, they told us all to avoid this particular area with all of the wires and everything, and I walked straight into it because I can't believe that I came in second. And then to come back and again come in third in that same competition in the people's choice was just mind-blowing, and it's like, okay, that's great. I um I accomplished something, but I won because people were listening, people saw what I was about, and it's not about the food, it was about colon cancer. And a couple of the guys who were in that competition who didn't win invited me or told me about another competition for Labor Day weekend. And I was like, okay, I'm gonna I'm gonna do that one, and getting a chance to do that one really gave me more time to prepare for the outreach part, and it was a bigger competition at Southridge. Um didn't come in in the in the millennial, as they would say, in first, second, or third. But I walked away feeling so much better because again, I got a chance to interact with probably 75 to 100 people who took literature.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_02:Who I had people sitting there saying, Oh, he's gonna go get a test. And taking them, do you mind if I take one of these? I'm like, that's what they're here for. And people coming up and some survivors coming up and sharing their stories and making sure that they let me know that they appreciated what we were doing. Um, a few people came by and showed me tattoos that they have for colon cancer um survivors. So having that opportunity to compete is great. I I love competition. We are a competitive family. Me and my brother competed in anything. We would probably compete in walking from one end of the room to the other if that was something that we could do.
SPEAKER_00:How do you respond to people when you tell them that your success is not based on winning?
SPEAKER_02:Well, when I I I tell people that um the first look, so you don't want to win? I was like, oh no, no, I want to win.
SPEAKER_00:Okay.
SPEAKER_02:But let me tell you that I could come in first. I could I could hit the Powerball. And none of it would mean as much to me as knowing that I saved one family from having to go through those 15 days. Nothing in the world is could bring me. More joy than knowing that my conversation sparked one person to go get a colonoscopy and to have a fighting chance because I firmly believe that we don't have to die from this. So being able to spread that awareness, literally, I'm I it's it gives me a high something that you may not believe when I tell you this because most people in my life don't believe, I'm painfully shy. But there are times in life that I can stand up and be able to speak on things if I believe in it, I can stand on it. And this I believe in and I will stand on because it makes a difference. And I don't have to know the family, I don't have to know the person. But knowing that what I'm doing makes a difference means more to me than winning. And trust me, I am a person that likes to collect trophies, and I I love that. I mean, being able to cook is a badge of honor for me. But being able to do this is more important.
SPEAKER_00:You have laid things out in a very clear way, and your willingness to put yourself out there to save somebody else pain from that you had to experience is honorable in the best way. So I commend you for doing that. Um, the work that I do, I'm right there with you in terms of handing out information, but I don't have something delicious usually to supplement the information to help it resonate and potentially digest a bit better. So I just know that um what you're sharing and what you're doing, your effort, it's landing, it's sticking. Um, hearing people say that they're gonna go get screened is phenomenal.
SPEAKER_02:It brings tears to my eyes every time I hear somebody um in my line of work. I I I'm in a I do environmental health and safety. So a part of my spiel seemingly seem it's every week to my crew is always you have health insurance. Okay, go use it. Yeah, don't sit here and tell me that you don't feel well and you won't go get checked out, whether it be a colonoscopy, whether again with the males, prostate, females, mammograms, whatever it is that we can do, we should be doing it to take care of ourselves. So that's my soapbox. I I stand on it and I will continue to stand on it as I speak. As I live and breathe, I'm going to continue to make sure that I I give that information out because it's just that important to me. And the bottom line is my little brother didn't die in vain.
SPEAKER_00:And that means so much to me. So if he were here today and saw what you're doing through food and awareness, what would you think he'd say?
SPEAKER_02:Something really off-color, but it in laughing, he would sit back and say, Man, that's that's good stuff right there. I knew you could do it. And we'd laugh and he'd still go back to the violation part and say to me, why didn't you stress that more? That even though we had these conversations, he would still push back and say, You could have told me more. Why didn't you tell me more? And the argument, brotherly argument would go back and forth. I did. I told you, and you just didn't want to listen. You just wanted to be that stronger brother at that point. And it would just be friendly banter, but it would be him basically saying thank you. Because again, in the end, people don't know you care till they know you care. And he knew that I cared. So right now he would be saying, Man, I didn't know you cared that much. To lead the way for me, and you're still doing it. Oh, that's yeah.
SPEAKER_00:The way that you helped pull that together, uh, answered my last question was man to man, brother to brother. If somebody was still avoiding taking an advantage of getting a colonoscopy, what would you tell them?
SPEAKER_02:I'll go with you. As Anthony said to me, put me to the test. I'll go with you. Just like I told him, when you call me, I'll drop everything.
unknown:Okay.
SPEAKER_00:Um I can't say anything but a huge thank you.
SPEAKER_02:Thank you for allowing me the opportunity to share this platform and be able to get this out and allow me to keep that memory alive. You're very welcome. And to have this conversation with you means so much because it's an opportunity for our community to see two brothers talk about something so important and get that awareness out and let them know that we can talk about something other than sports, and and it'd be a good conversation. And I and I appreciate everything that you're doing with with bringing awareness. So again, thank you. Let me give you your flowers for what you do. It's so important to see someone that looks like me that's out spreading that word.
SPEAKER_01:Okay.
SPEAKER_02:Well, hey, I have something for you. Oh, you have something for me? Yes. Um got up this morning and I knew you were coming, so I wanted to prepare something for you that I do for my competition. So give me one second. Oh my gosh. Try it. I also have a line of seasoning and um sauce that's on there that I would like to give to you. Oh, thank you, sir, for all that you do.
SPEAKER_00:Razzle dazzle seasoning. Scott's four pepper blood. I'm very excited, and I am going to take a bite because I want to feel everything that the competition space had to offer.
SPEAKER_02:I hope that's a good look. I hope that's uh a good bite there for you, sir.
SPEAKER_00:A good bite, man. Hold on. No, once again, this is such a treat. Thank you so, so much. And let's find out other ways to connect. As I reflect on this holiday season, I'm reminded of the power of caregiving, the importance of early screening, and the impact one voice can have. Scott Cooper's story honors his brother's life and serves as a reminder that his awareness, education, and action can save lives. Thank you all.
